by Shannon Caughey

“Control what you can control.” Coaches often preach this to their athletes, usually as a reminder not to fixate on things like how a game is being officiated or what the weather conditions are. When understood with a different focus, however, it’s a crucial element of being a godly coach. In 2 Peter 1, Peter says that part of pursuing godliness has to do with controlling what you can control. 

As we’re considering how to be a godly coach in this series of devotions, we’re utilizing the definition of godliness provided by author Jerry Bridges: “devotion to God which results in a life that is pleasing to him.” We grow in godliness as we actively partner with God’s work in us by making every effort to supplement our faith with several important qualities. 2 Peter 1:5b-6a begins this list of needed qualities: “Supplement your faith with a generous provision of moral excellence, and moral excellence with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control…” We’ve previously discussed moral excellence and knowledge, so we turn now to a third characteristic of godliness: self-control.

Peter is encouraging us as followers of Christ to control what we can control: ourselves. Yet most of us struggle with self-control in at least some areas. How can we grow in this quality that is so crucial for living and coaching in godly ways?

Utilizing a sports metaphor, 1 Corinthians 9:24-27 points the way: “²⁴ Do you not know that in a race all the runners compete, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. ²⁵ Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. ²⁶ So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. ²⁷ But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.”

Growth in self-control which results in a life pleasing to the Lord includes these dimensions:

1. Recognize what’s at stake. Self-control is not a “nice if you have it but no big deal if you don’t” quality. When it comes to the life of devotion to the Lord, self-control plays an essential role in determining whether we obtain the prize (v. 24) or we’re disqualified (v. 27). Just as the athletes you coach won’t reach their full potential if they lack self-control, you’ll miss out on the fullness of all God desires to do in and through your coaching and your life if you fail to exercise self-control.

2. Do a personal “self-control assessment.” Take an honest look at the various areas of your approach to coaching and life. Where is self-control lacking? Is it with your anger, the way you speak, or even the way you express yourself nonverbally when you’re frustrated or impatient? Is it in making sure you invest your time and energy into the right things rather than getting distracted? Do you struggle with self-control when it comes to certain appetites, whether it’s eating too much or sexual desires expressed in sinful ways? Ask God to reveal to you those areas where you’re “running aimlessly” and undermining your growth in godliness.

3. Follow Jesus’ example of exercising self-control for the benefit of others. Consider how Jesus “disciplined his body and kept it under control” (v. 27) so that he could fulfill his mission. He resisted every temptation to sin (Heb. 4:15). He did not retaliate when he was unjustly subjected to false accusations, cruel suffering, and undeserved execution on a cross. In all things, Jesus exercised self-control for our benefit—so that we can experience salvation and life in him.

When Jesus is your Lord and Leader, your perspective on self-control is transformed. You realize that self-control isn’t just for our personal benefit. When you live and coach in godly ways, it benefits others. When you exercise self-control in choosing Christ-honoring attitudes, words, and actions, your players and fellow coaches will benefit. When through self-control you consistently pursue spiritual, emotional, and physical health, you’ll be able to offer those you care about the best version of yourself: the godliness that God has in mind for you.  

While self-control is about “controlling what you can control,” remember that the Lord gives you “everything [you] need for living a godly life” (2 Peter 1:3). You’re able to exercise self-control because you have Christ’s power and grace through his Spirit working in you. You can then give those around you the significant benefits of your growth in godly coaching and living.

For reflection: What next steps do you need to grow in the self-control needed for godliness as a coach and in other areas? Commit to making every effort to implement these steps. Thank God that he gives you everything you need for living a godly life.